The Backward 2 Week Wait

February 22, 2013

March 8th is slowly creeping up.  It is insane the amount of emotions it brings.  Crazy swings from hope and excitement to it could be TWINS, to doubt, fear, and questioning "what if none survive the thaw," "what if they don't implant," "what if I miscarry again?"  When you add these swings to hormonal swings (lupron/estradial to be exact) you get, well, me.  Luckily, I can control most of the feelings and it's only my husband or close friends who see me in "freak out" mode.  With the annoucementof each new pregnancy, I feel happy for them, but it makes me want it more and it stings as a reminder that there are no guarantees with this stuff.  I did read that 90% of "infertile" couples will go on to have a baby at some point.  But if I look at the glass 10% full....

Anyways, today I saw my countdown.  I realized I'm in a pre-2 week wait!  So many fellow bloggers have been so encouraging!! One online friend named Jen (you can see her blog here)had to go through a miscarriage and 2 IVFs herself and is currently expecting her little miracle soon.  She encouraged me to remain positive and to almost think of myself as currently one-week pregnant.  In a very positive/optimistic world, I guess that makes sense!  I will find out in less than 4 weeks if I'm four weeks pregnant.  Now that is seeing the glass 90% full!  I know in my heart if I honestly have a 50% chance, I might as well choose to dwell on the positive chance than the negative since they are equal.  It's jus so scary to allow hope in when it has hit me so hard before.  Thank you to all who follow the blog, pray, comment, etc.  God has brought you all to me and I pray for you all by name.  :)  Let the Backward Two Week Wait Begin!!

1 comment:

  1. I am praying so hard for you! Stay strong and faithful.

    ReplyDelete

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