July ish, 2013
This week has definitely allowed me to flex my faith muscles. Last fresh cycle I felt like the embryologist called me daily for updates. The last update I got was on Day 3 that all 11 were still in the running. As a worrier, I flashed back to my last cycle. All TWENTY were still in the running on Day 3 but just 6 made it to blastocyst and out of the 4 "perfect" ones transferred, I'm still not pregnant. Eleven seemed a lot slimmer to me and of course worse casenario is nothing makes it to Day 5. On the bright side, I have trained my mouth and mind to whisper Jesus and remind myself no matter what I do/don't do, He is in control and makes the call.
On a great note, since they triggered me a day early (day 8) I had 1 day of mild bloating but by the 3rd day after SURGERY I shoveled dirt for our yard and my parents for 3 hours and mowed the lawn. AND shoveled bark dust. The best part of all this was after we did our yard, I decided to help my dad (they are our neighbors) and he gave me $10! LOL, it was like a little allowance. I feel amazing and am so thankful I avoided OHSS.
I got the call today, Day 5, that it was "game time" and that I won the "best embryos of the day" award. I'm guarded because last time I got that award too. Just because they are "high quality" doesn't mean they implant or that they are normal (flashback early miscarriage).
I over zealously filled my bladder. The embryologist came to talk to us and said he was shocked our FET didn't work (they dethawed beautifully) but that infertility is unpredictable (no crap). He went on to say that we have SEVEN blastocysts that meet freezing criteria with a possible 2 more he can add tomorrow. I was shocked because last time we just had 6 with more than double the fertilized embryos to begin with. I told him I wanted to transfer 3. He laughed. Then realized I wasn't kidding. He asked "why?" I pointed out that FOUR high quality had been transferred and that nothing stuck. He stared a me and my husband silently and said "you will have to talk to the Dr."
Well, I was one step ahead of him and had talked with her a few days before. We know the risks but at this point with this being our 11th total treatment (including IUIs) I don't want to mess around. Triplets would be nuts, and our goal is a healthy baby, but I do want to do this again.
The Dr. did her best to try to re-convince me one last time "you're young, your embryos are good" but she said, "I'm fine with 3" and as she was setting up said the chances of all 3 sticking are slim anyway. I would be lying if I said Darren didn't look a little nervous with all the concern, but we had prayed God would make it clear if we were to not tranfer 3, and we both felt peace about it. We decided to transfer our two "BEST" 4AA embryos and then lucky number 7 (he said this last one was still like a B plus). It went smooth. The only small hiccup was I had to get up to go to the bathroom after 20 minutes (instead of waiting the 30-40 they prefer) but the nurse convinced me it was safe.
Darren then drove me to an acupuncturist that was willing to be "on call." It was different than the regular one I see but I felt better going. The only annoying part was she asked me if I have had all my hormones checked and if my husband had been checked (read in sarcastic voice 'oh, we've only done 3 IVFs and haven't even thought of that?). Lol.
The nurse on duty today told me that I'm on "princess duty" and to lay low the rest of the day. I've watched like 10 episodes of Arrested Development and whenever I need something I refer to my husband as "helper" instead of Darren :) I feel peaceful now, praying that lasts the next 9 days.
*Final count: 17 retrieved, 11 mature, 11 fertilized, 9 made it to blastocyst, transfered 3, 6 frozen (added to our 2 other frosties from 1st transfer so we have 8 frosties total). Infterility is so random. Last time had 20 mature fertilzied eggs and 6 made it to day 5; this time I had half that amount but 3 more made it? So strange. Of course several people I follow only ending up having TWO viable embyos total and still end up getting pregnant. I've had tons of awesome ones and nothing yet. I know too well that ART isn't 100% guaranteed and although I'm thankful for the numbers, it doesn't mean they are all normal or healthy (we didn't pay for genetic testing) But, for now I get to flash around the annoying term PUPO! That's me! Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise ;)
Holly! So happy to hear that everything went smoothly!!! I am cheering you guys on! You and really are in such a similar boat with "perfect" numbers and fabulous embryos...and then nothing buy tears. This time I'm praying it will be different in that you'll cry tears of JOY!ReplyDelete
i want tears of joy!! For sure. I keep reminding myself this is a different batch this is a different batch. AND YOU inspired me to try my best to stay away from evil Dr. google and just try to not go insane.Delete
Fingers crossed Holly! I'll be praying for you the next two weeks! POPO!ReplyDelete
Thank you so much love!! I think of you guys so often!! I really appreciate the prayers.Delete
I have been reading your last few posts! Excited to hear that all is going well & praying that one (or more) of those little ones makes itself nice and comfy for 9 months!ReplyDelete
Prayers mean the world! No one in our family knows so we don't have a lot of specific prayers out there :) I like the one or more making it comfy!! Thank you!Delete
Woohoo! So happy everything went smoothly. Praying a ton that this is your time. I keep talking about your posts and where you're at to my husband and finally said to him "Do I need to keep saying Holly 'from the blog' or can I just say Holly?" He said he knows who you are so it's just Holly now! Praying for those three little ones to cling on tight :) And praying Jesus would be so near to you as you wait.ReplyDelete
Lorna I love this!! I too am ALWAYS talking to my husband about people from the blog world too. I've just graduated to HOLLY!! Thank you so so so much for your prayers it means so much.Delete
Holly, You Have Been On My Mind Lately (Sorry For The Crazy capping-it's My Crazy Phone.) :) I Am Beyond Thrilled To Read That You Got So Many Great Embryos And Have Three Little Lovelies Making Themselves At Home In Your Womb. Amazing. :) I Am Praying Hard For You And Your Sweet Ones. Please Let Me Know If You Would Like A New Heart With Three Little Ones Inside To Hold While You Wait. I Would Be So Happy To Make One For You! Remember You Are Strong And Your Body Knows What To Do. PUPO!!!!! (I Love This Saying!)ReplyDelete
Amy you are the sweetest! Yes! Send me the one with 3! A new one for a new cycle, fun!! Thanks for the prayers so so much.Delete
Enjoy being on princess duty! Congratulations on such am amazing turnout too. Having 8 on ice is priceless. Hoping for the very best outcome for you in about 9 days!ReplyDelete
thank you so much Emily!! 8 on ice is a blessing for sure!Delete
Those are some great numbers to have on this wild unpredictable ride!ReplyDelete
PUPO? Baaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Love it. That made me literally LOL. I needed that on a Monday like this. You know I'm prayig like mad over here girl!!!!ReplyDelete
Big prayers for you!!!!!!!!!!ReplyDelete